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The Book of Not Entirely Useful Advice

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available
From acclaimed writer A.F. Harrold comes a riotous poetry collection that encourages readers to think critically—perfect for fans of Shel Silverstein!
Packed with silly rhymes and witty wordplay, A.F. Harrold's poetry is positively bursting with fun—and advice. But it's not always the most useful. . .
Never apologize to a door you've walked into, unless it's a really special door.

Don't serve a cat soup when the cat wants jelly. Tomato soup won't fill a feline belly.

Don't put a rock in a roll, unless you hate having teeth.

Among the seemingly nonsensical stanzas on onions, sausages, and kilted koalas are exercises in critical thinking—what advice should readers follow, and what should they dismiss? Harrold's short, clever poems work seamlessly alongside Mini Grey's vibrant art to create visual gags that will have readers in stitches. Both silly and poignant, this book is perfect for curious readers, poets, and cabbages everywhere!
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  • Reviews

    • Kirkus

      January 1, 2021
      Who wouldn't welcome a smattering of advice now and then? Even if some of its practicality seems questionable. This collection is divided into four sections "mainly relating" to broad topics such as food or animals. Explored largely in free verse are topics ranging from the many similarities between blackbirds and bananas, how many is too many tigers at a picnic, and the value of an onion for self-defense. Of course, there is a healthy mix of wordplay, absurdism, and the occasional actually profound thought. Harrold includes some interactive features, such as blank spaces for readers to contribute their own poems or drawings and the Advice-a-Tron 216, a chart that generates pieces of advice with a six-sided die. In addition to some pages of "free-floating advice" readers are encouraged to cut out, there is an index that locates both references within the book and sundry other things, like "where to find more" books ("the library"). This collection contains a fair amount of Briticisms (a poem called "Jumper" closes cheekily with a joke about "a sweater") that may require some help for readers new to them. As observed in the initial "Note for the Reader," Grey's illustrations are "beautifully colorful," with a fancy-free, sketchlike quality characterized by dynamic lines and perspectives. The author, a White, bearded man, appears in a drawn incarnation throughout; of background human characters, only a couple read as people of color. A good bit of fun. (Poetry. 8-12)

      COPYRIGHT(2021) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • The Horn Book

      March 1, 2021
      Harrold (The Song from Somewhere Else, rev. 5/17) presents poems (a few repurposed from previous collections) full of practical and not-so-practical insights on topics ranging from compliment-giving to where not to dunk your biscuits. Some are in loosely metered rhyme, others in free verse, often in an amusingly formal voice. "Never muddle your lunch box and pencil case, / because wood and graphite don't taste / very nice. / (I only ever did this twice.)" It's all very silly, and sometimes gross ("Rabbit Risks") or dark ("Nasty Rabbit Poem") -- but it's clear, even without the introductory admonition to "use your brain and work out for yourself which bits to follow and which bits to ignore," that hardly anything is meant to be taken seriously. Adding to the sense of playfulness is the poems' varied placement in and around Grey's (Traction Man Is Here!, rev. 3/05) vibrantly colored illustrations, as well as occasional pages that encourage reader participation: a few blank spaces for writing or drawing; a fill-in-the-blanks "Advice-a-Tron 216." Make of the advice what you will, but enjoy -- and, seriously, don't put a crocodile in your ear. Shoshana Flax

      (Copyright 2021 by The Horn Book, Incorporated, Boston. All rights reserved.)

    • Booklist

      Starred review from March 1, 2021
      Grades 1-4 *Starred Review* In this generous poetry collection, previously published in the UK, Harrold offers rhymed and free-verse warnings to, for instance, avoid tigers lurking under your toast, ducks in your soup (Why? "I sip the soupy stuff . . . / which tastes like the underside / of a swimming duck"), and the "mushroomy feetiness" of Granny's Bourbonzola biscuits. Elsewhere he compares blackbirds and bananas (both "surprising, but not unheard of" pie fillings), wonders how to grow a lamppost ("Perhaps I'll plant a desk lamp / and water it each night"), catalogs "Silences" ("Cat paws through the garden. / Butterflies in flight. / Morning daisies yawning. / the slowly falling night"), and invites readers to create their own cautionary admonitions after filling the blank spaces in a mix-and-match "Advice-A-Tron." Grey's illustrations capture the freewheeling spirit of the poems with bright and funny images ranging from a hybrid banana-bird and a predatory-looking collage of photographed toast slices to an entire mixed spread of cakes and very similar-looking rocks that, luckily, comes with a key. The author generously offers refunds to any readers eaten by tigers.

      COPYRIGHT(2021) Booklist, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • The Horn Book

      January 1, 2021
      Harrold (The Song from Somewhere Else, rev. 5/17) presents poems (a few repurposed from previous collections) full of practical and not-so-practical insights on topics ranging from compliment-giving to where not to dunk your biscuits. Some are in loosely metered rhyme, others in free verse, often in an amusingly formal voice. "Never muddle your lunch box and pencil case, / because wood and graphite don't taste / very nice. / (I only ever did this twice.)" It's all very silly, and sometimes gross ("Rabbit Risks") or dark ("Nasty Rabbit Poem") -- but it's clear, even without the introductory admonition to "use your brain and work out for yourself which bits to follow and which bits to ignore," that hardly anything is meant to be taken seriously. Adding to the sense of playfulness is the poems' varied placement in and around Grey's (Traction Man Is Here!, rev. 3/05) vibrantly colored illustrations, as well as occasional pages that encourage reader participation: a few blank spaces for writing or drawing; a fill-in-the-blanks "Advice-a-Tron 216." Make of the advice what you will, but enjoy -- and, seriously, don't put a crocodile in your ear.

      (Copyright 2021 by The Horn Book, Incorporated, Boston. All rights reserved.)

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