September 4, 1995
Tannen probes the way gender roles shape the ways men and women communicate in the workplace, and how these differences lead to misunderstandings.
Starred review from October 3, 1994
This wise and widely informative book fulfills its promise to do for the workplace what Tannen's You Just Don't Understand has done for the home front-heighten the reader's perception of the ways in which gender, power structures and cultural constraints affect communication. Basing her discussion on extensive interviews with workers, managers and executives at a range of businesses, Tannen identifies-and decodes-various conversational ``rituals.'' For example, women tend to use the words ``I'm sorry'' as an ``expression of understanding-and caring''; but men generally interpret ``I'm sorry'' as an acceptance of blame. Tannen demonstrates that women, conditioned in childhood not to sound too self-confident, are likely to issue orders or implement plans indirectly (and therefore don't receive full recognition for their work); men, conditioned not to sound uncertain, may perceive requests for feedback as an admission of weakness. Offering clear explanations of various conversational ``styles,'' Tannen passes few judgments; rather, she offers readers a wider variety of strategies to express themselves. Filled with gracefully analyzed examples of job-related conversations, every page delivers a shock of recognition. Major ad/promo; author tour.